I must also confess to having the worst record, in my family at least, for picking teams. I was actually doing pretty well this year though. You see, I picked the Jets. Why the Jets, you ask? Well, Mark Sanchez used to play for USC, and, well, I know people who went to USC, and, well,
well, those are good reasons to pick a team, right? So, on a whim, at the very beginning of the season I picked the Jets to go to the Super Bowl. And, darn it, they almost made it! Until this past weekend, that is.
Another little confession: I also picked the Bears, as in Bears vs. Jets for the Super Bowl, and guess what? Both teams lost. What can I say? I’m an epic loser…but now I have a teeny, tiny problem…I’m a football fan without a football team!
I can’t just sit there come February 6 and watch the Super Bowl and not have a team to root for. That would be completely un-American! My choice, as you know, is the Green Bay Packers or the
Steelers… Pittsburgh or Wisconsin …Aaron Rodgers or Ben Roethlisberger…green and gold or black and gold. That’s it! Colors. I can pick my team based on colors. Let’s see, my high school alma mater was green and gold…but, oh no, my kids’ current school is black and gold. What to do, what to do? Sorry kids, I’m going with green and gold. Green Bay Packers it is! Pennsylvania
Whew! Glad that’s all settled. I tell my husband my pick and he writes it down on our official “pick paper.” It’s all very scientific around here, folks.
Then my husband comes home yesterday and says, “Um, I have another option for Super Bowl Sunday and I just wanted to see if you guys were really and truly going to watch the Super Bowl game. I mean, Jane, your Jets are out now, so, you know, are you still planning on actually watching the game? Are the kids actually planning on watching the game?”
My response is something along the lines of: “What? Huh? Watch the Super Bowl game? Of course I’m going to watch the Super Bowl game. I watch it every year. We watch it every year. What are you saying…you don’t want to watch it with me this year…for the first time, in, like 20 years?!”
His response goes something like: “Well, you know, I have this really great ‘option’ (why does he keep calling it that) and a lot of times, well, you know, a lot of times we start the game and then about halfway into it you guys all leave and I’m left sitting there all by myself watching the game…all by myself.”
“That’s not true,” I say, “we always watch all of the game right there with you, right kids?”
Their response goes something like: “Well, mom, actually dad’s right, we do kind of come and go and we don’t actually sit and watch the entire game.”
Me: “What?” (Oh, these kids, they just take his side every time, I swear!) “I always watch the entire game, and I have done so for the past, well, for the past as long as I can remember. It’s Super Bowl Sunday, for crying out loud. What else would I be doing on Super Bowl Sunday but watching the Super Bowl game?!”
Him: “Well, I was invited to play in a poker tournament (ahh, the ‘option’) and, well, I think it would be fun. But, you know, if you guys are going to watch the game then I’ll stay here and watch it with you guys. But Jane, what if you were, like, at a spa or something getting, you know, a massage and a pedicure? You wouldn’t really be interested in watching the game then, right?”
Me: “Of course I’d be interested in watching the game. I watch it EVERY year!”
Wait a minute, did he just say massage…and pedicure…and spa? Is he bribing me?
Me again: “Poker tournament on Super Bowl Sunday, huh? Sounds good to me dear, have fun!”